1) I have gotten 8 interviews done for my dissertation! 30 minutes into the last one, which was yesterday, my silly little digital voice recorder shut off. It's an Olympus WS-100, and I love it because it was very cheap and until yesterday had been somewhat reliable. I'm not sure what happened yesterday. It issued forth a nervous beep, I picked it up and saw it flashing "Lo" and an empty battery, and then it immediately turned itself off. Hmm, that was weird, I thought, because I always anal-ly check the battery before I leave. Luckily, the part of the interview that I really needed most to be in his words was captured pre-meltdown (this I consider a great blessing, since we actually did the interview backwards as it turned out, and under normal circumstances I would have missed that part!). The crazy part was that after this, I started frantically writing down the things he said and then my pen ran out of ink! No, I'm not kidding! So I had to stop him and Bless his heart, he offered me a pen. What a very nice guy he was. I love interviewing acupuncturists. I have met some really great people. I'll never forget the sweet man who told me, "You will have many successes" at the end of our interview. I am actually looking forward to transcribing that one. Of course, I'm almost done with the acupuncturist interviews (yay!) so I'll soon have to move on to physicians. Eek. I'm a little more nervous about them. Well, once thing at a time.
2) I saw Transformers. Awesome. It's not the cartoon version. Get over it, nerds. It's fiction anyway.
3) I finally bought a new iPod to replace the one that was viciously and maliciously stolen from my car during that thunder storm. Poor Jeffrey, out there alone in this world, probably he ended up in the locker of some rude rich teenager troublemaker who was disappointed that the iPod he lucked upon when he and his friends were causing random destruction of the neighborhood cars was a pre-video version. Poor little Jeffrey. It was hard for me to replace my sweet little boy, who also happened to be very expensive to replace. I ended up buying another one online at the Apple Store. It was a pretty good price; I got the 30 GB Video-playing iPod. I don't really need one that big or with video-playing capability, but it was the smallest one they had. The best part is that I could get little Jeffrey, Jr. engraved. He's so sweet, and this time I got the black one. I'm really enjoying it.
4) My stepdad is getting better and better. He should be going back to work in a week or so, light duty at first. I'm so lucky that they caught his blockage before he had a heart attack. Life is good.
5) I am on Weight Watchers and finally feel like I am gaining control over how I look. I figured, I'm turning 30 in a couple of months; I don't know what I want to do to celebrate (nothing seems exciting enough to match how truly excited I really am about it, in some very sick-feeling way) but I know I want to look as good as possible doing it. I've been exercising regularly for some time now but only after I started watching what I eat have I begun to lose weight. It feels really good. I look forward to fitting into my clothes again. Maybe I'll buy a new skirt or something, although I'm actually pretty happy with all of my clothes, I just wish I fit into them without looking like a white-collar hooker. :)
6) In honor of my monumental birthday, I have decided to get a portrait made (photography). I'm pretty excited about that, and I know my family members will be excited to have a portrait of me that is less than 12 years old. I wish my cats could be in it, but I'd like to get it made somewhere outside the city, or in a park or something, and I don't really think the cats would enjoy the trip. I'm starting to think that maybe I'll try to get it made on my birthday. Making this decision has been strangely empowering. Most people get portraits made when they get engaged or married, or have a baby. Getting this portrait made is like saying that I am enough. It's empowering, but it's not actually how I saw myself spending my thirtieth birthday. Sometimes I get pretty sad about the things in my life that I don't have that I always wanted, but the truth is, when I manage to forget about the social pressures or socially constructed expectations (of others and of myself), I realize that my life is exactly how I want it to be. I would like to have kids one day, but I can, as soon as I get a stable job. It's funny, that's kind of how I always wanted to do it anyway. I don't actually enjoy being in romantic relationships. Sometimes I laugh when I catch myself mourning the lack of one in my life.
7) I am not sure if I have emphasized in the past how much I love the show "What Not to Wear" on TLC. If I had to choose between a What Not to Wear episode and a Top Chef episode, I would be very stressed out. (Although it does alarm me how many of the worst dressed people actually watch the show, apparently having learned nothing.)
8) Speaking of looking good, I am really digging my shorter hair. The front layers follow my jaw line, and the back layers rest at the top of my back. This guy did a great job. I hope he's still there when I go back (the turnover rate at my salon is higher than the one at McDonald's, I swear). I'm thinking about getting my hair done before my portrait. How luxurious. I can't wait until I get a real job.
9) Oh, speaking of real jobs, UNCG is hiring! I probably won't get the job (and wouldn't want it, actually) because they are trying to be more of a research university (the way many state schools are going, in attempting to get more funding), but it's so nice to know that schools in Greensboro actually do hire people. :) Of course, I must admit that this makes it seem unlikely that they will hire an adjunct lecturer for the year after I graduate, and I was kind of hoping to get a job like that, since they're much less research-oriented than tenure track positions (and therefore more perfect for me, aside from the instability variable. Anyway, seeing this position advertised makes me very excited about the possibility of actually getting a job, period! I mean, exclamation point!
10) Sometimes I think that maybe I'm thirty and single because my potential family is out there waiting for me to get a job in that town and then move there, making it possible for my intended family to find me. How exciting to know that somewhere out there is a place for me. I just have to find it. And the fact is, I have no choice but to find it. :) And in the meantime, my life is a lot less complicated and stressful than it could be.
The moral of the story:
Life really is what you make of it. Two people, both given the same pile of shit to work with, may choose to a) mope and complain and feel bad, or b) make a shit sandwich. (If you haven't seen Drowning Mona, you really should.) See, I have my moments of optimism, too!
Charity :)
1 comment:
What a nice post. Congratulations to your positive outlook.
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