Honestly, this has not been a great week. The bits I can share include a hurricane warning on my birthday, being stuck inside all weekend long with our kittens, unable to go anywhere to celebrate, and our house flooding on Monday. I'll stop there and leave the rest to your imagination.
As you may have guessed, I did not finish any of my 40 before 40 or 400 before 40 or 4 before 40 lists or anything similar. I now have one more thing that I think I did poorly though, so I could easily make a list of 40 failures before 40, and perhaps to cap off this week of turning 41, I could even list 40 failures since 40. It's been a sickening unsatisfying messy cycle of getting wind in my sails and then having my sails fall apart over and over and over again.
Life is good, though. I could be incredibly or uncomfortably unhealthy, rather than just inconveniently and embarrassingly so. I could be destitute and without the safety of a roof over my head, or I could be living life with no amazing wonderful cats which would also be terrible.
Overall things aren't terrible but I just expected more, you know? I just expected more, that's all.
Thanks for listening.
Showing posts with label homeownership. Show all posts
Showing posts with label homeownership. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 19, 2018
Thursday, June 01, 2017
joys of homeownership, part 2
i can't believe our dryer has been broken for almost a month now. although in other ways it seems like years - we finally went to the store to buy a dryer, disillusioned but relieved to be getting the memorial day sale price at the very least (it was 10% off - not sure I'd say that's a huge sale but I digress)
we looked around and saw the ones we had found online - we asked the salesperson whether we'd have to take the floor model, as the online chat representative had mentioned
she looked at us like we were crazy or like she was really confused it was hard to tell - no of course not, we always order them straight from the vendor, well, unless it's one of the [home improvement sales jargon word] sales - pause - and this isn't - no this isn't one of those sales - ok thanks we'll just look around
so we looked around and decided to go with a different model anyway because they offered a steam feature in the washer - who needs a steam feature in a washer - who knows why does it matter what's the meaning of life anyway
we called to her and she brought us to her desk in the middle of the store to place our order and we sat there despondent as she looked up our washer - looks good - and dryer -
oh you're never going to believe this but it's on backorder - she tried to turn the screen to show us but it got stuck on the credit card reader - it's in transit but we don't expect it until 9/11 - wait, september? disbelief replaced despondency - yes! can you believe it?
yes.
well i might be able to get one for you sooner if you upgrade to the next model or you could go with the other one you were looking at - should we upgrade? what's the difference? who even cares any more? what's the point of any of this? did she say september? fine, let's upgrade even though i know you're just scamming us for the extra $100 bucks let's just throw it at this problem and make it go away -
oh you're never going to believe this but it's on backorder - she tried to turn the screen to show us but it got stuck on the credit card reader and she accidentally turned it off - it's in transit but we don't expect it until 9/11 - wait, september? - yes! can you believe it?
yes.
do you want to try the other model? she looked at us - well we can't possibly wait until september to dry our fucking clothes i thought and looked at collin, delirium and depletion replacing despondency at this point - yes please look up the other model
well it's on backorder too but should be here by 6/18 - that's june right? just a couple of weeks? - to think that we were worried we'd get it before the crew came to replace the ductwork on the first LOLOLOLOL
ok thanks very much here are one million forms to sign thank you have a nice day they will call you in a jillion years to schedule delivery i will never see you again or speak with you but if there's a problem with the delivery just keep all the forms and bring them back to the store and make sure the delivery people sign too otherwise we will think you are lying because we don't trust you any more than you trust us
we walked away - do you need anything else? - um yes we can go out through the garden center and i'll get some weed poison because i'm tired of those weeds in the gravel of our walk - yeah me too let's poison the shit out of those weeds
we looked around and saw the ones we had found online - we asked the salesperson whether we'd have to take the floor model, as the online chat representative had mentioned
she looked at us like we were crazy or like she was really confused it was hard to tell - no of course not, we always order them straight from the vendor, well, unless it's one of the [home improvement sales jargon word] sales - pause - and this isn't - no this isn't one of those sales - ok thanks we'll just look around
so we looked around and decided to go with a different model anyway because they offered a steam feature in the washer - who needs a steam feature in a washer - who knows why does it matter what's the meaning of life anyway
we called to her and she brought us to her desk in the middle of the store to place our order and we sat there despondent as she looked up our washer - looks good - and dryer -
oh you're never going to believe this but it's on backorder - she tried to turn the screen to show us but it got stuck on the credit card reader - it's in transit but we don't expect it until 9/11 - wait, september? disbelief replaced despondency - yes! can you believe it?
yes.
well i might be able to get one for you sooner if you upgrade to the next model or you could go with the other one you were looking at - should we upgrade? what's the difference? who even cares any more? what's the point of any of this? did she say september? fine, let's upgrade even though i know you're just scamming us for the extra $100 bucks let's just throw it at this problem and make it go away -
oh you're never going to believe this but it's on backorder - she tried to turn the screen to show us but it got stuck on the credit card reader and she accidentally turned it off - it's in transit but we don't expect it until 9/11 - wait, september? - yes! can you believe it?
yes.
do you want to try the other model? she looked at us - well we can't possibly wait until september to dry our fucking clothes i thought and looked at collin, delirium and depletion replacing despondency at this point - yes please look up the other model
well it's on backorder too but should be here by 6/18 - that's june right? just a couple of weeks? - to think that we were worried we'd get it before the crew came to replace the ductwork on the first LOLOLOLOL
ok thanks very much here are one million forms to sign thank you have a nice day they will call you in a jillion years to schedule delivery i will never see you again or speak with you but if there's a problem with the delivery just keep all the forms and bring them back to the store and make sure the delivery people sign too otherwise we will think you are lying because we don't trust you any more than you trust us
we walked away - do you need anything else? - um yes we can go out through the garden center and i'll get some weed poison because i'm tired of those weeds in the gravel of our walk - yeah me too let's poison the shit out of those weeds
Friday, May 19, 2017
joys of homeownership
hi there my dearest homies.
please allow me to start at the beginning.
our home inspector told us before we bought the house that the ductwork was in shambles. we included in our offer the contingency that the previous owner had to replace or fix it but had a trip to san francisco scheduled the week before closing. like the good-natured naive northern californians we were at the time, we assumed 1) that our realtor was on the up-and-up, and 2) that the home inspector was a man of integrity and compassion, and 3) that the homeowner was a DIY pseudo-master who would try to get something substandard through if possible not necessarily because of any bad intentions but because he believed it was all done 100% correctly (we were right about the last one, actually).
our realtor walked through the re-inspection with the home inspector and the homeowner since we were 3000 miles away and gave it the thumbs-up. fast-forward to the first week in the house when we noticed the living room vibrating. we called a repairman who told us it was just because the furnace/blower was stacked precariously on some cement blocks and it had gotten unbalanced somehow, probably during the re-inspection, and oh my god have you seen your ductwork LOL YOU GOT A DATE WEDNESDAY BABY.
so yesterday after months of getting quotes and talking to various companies and having various companies pass us off to other companies because they stopped doing HVAC and deciding whether we wanted to replace our shitty outdoor AC unit that was only four years old or our shitty furnace and blower that was only 30-ish years old or our evaporator coil that was only 15-ish years old or our water heater that was only 20-ish years old or all of the above (we ended up replacing the water heater back in december and postponing the rest) we finally agreed on a project that will cost close to $10k (and then our AC broke one 90 degree day but turns out it was just the evaporating coil that had frozen solid NBD) and all this would be a lot easier to stomach if i had a job already and then today...
a guy came to look at our dryer which quit abruptly a few weeks ago and determined that it would cost $450 to fix it which is basically the same price as a new dryer and since the old dryer is 7-11 years old (we don't have any of the paperwork because the homeowner didn't leave it WHY WOULD HE) we have to replace it. so no doing any of the ginormous amount of laundry currently stacked up in our bedroom and on top of that i have to find a dryer to buy and maybe it's time to get a job but i heard from the job i really wanted yesterday and they already filled the position so i'm trying to keep a positive outlook - oh and did i mention i'm getting ready to turn 40 in a few months and i'm 40 pounds overweight?
i know i'm being very un-Dude right now but the stress is getting to me man. it's getting to me.
oh this was called the joys of homeownership, right. well let's see.
um...
i'm glad we don't share walls with anyone because when i play Leonard Cohen REALLY LOUD once Collin goes to Whole Foods to get his salad for lunch, no one will call the police. so that's something.
please allow me to start at the beginning.
our home inspector told us before we bought the house that the ductwork was in shambles. we included in our offer the contingency that the previous owner had to replace or fix it but had a trip to san francisco scheduled the week before closing. like the good-natured naive northern californians we were at the time, we assumed 1) that our realtor was on the up-and-up, and 2) that the home inspector was a man of integrity and compassion, and 3) that the homeowner was a DIY pseudo-master who would try to get something substandard through if possible not necessarily because of any bad intentions but because he believed it was all done 100% correctly (we were right about the last one, actually).
our realtor walked through the re-inspection with the home inspector and the homeowner since we were 3000 miles away and gave it the thumbs-up. fast-forward to the first week in the house when we noticed the living room vibrating. we called a repairman who told us it was just because the furnace/blower was stacked precariously on some cement blocks and it had gotten unbalanced somehow, probably during the re-inspection, and oh my god have you seen your ductwork LOL YOU GOT A DATE WEDNESDAY BABY.
so yesterday after months of getting quotes and talking to various companies and having various companies pass us off to other companies because they stopped doing HVAC and deciding whether we wanted to replace our shitty outdoor AC unit that was only four years old or our shitty furnace and blower that was only 30-ish years old or our evaporator coil that was only 15-ish years old or our water heater that was only 20-ish years old or all of the above (we ended up replacing the water heater back in december and postponing the rest) we finally agreed on a project that will cost close to $10k (and then our AC broke one 90 degree day but turns out it was just the evaporating coil that had frozen solid NBD) and all this would be a lot easier to stomach if i had a job already and then today...
a guy came to look at our dryer which quit abruptly a few weeks ago and determined that it would cost $450 to fix it which is basically the same price as a new dryer and since the old dryer is 7-11 years old (we don't have any of the paperwork because the homeowner didn't leave it WHY WOULD HE) we have to replace it. so no doing any of the ginormous amount of laundry currently stacked up in our bedroom and on top of that i have to find a dryer to buy and maybe it's time to get a job but i heard from the job i really wanted yesterday and they already filled the position so i'm trying to keep a positive outlook - oh and did i mention i'm getting ready to turn 40 in a few months and i'm 40 pounds overweight?
oh this was called the joys of homeownership, right. well let's see.
um...
i'm glad we don't share walls with anyone because when i play Leonard Cohen REALLY LOUD once Collin goes to Whole Foods to get his salad for lunch, no one will call the police. so that's something.
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