Verizon: Never Again!!!

I have been getting letters from Verizon begging me to upgrade my plan--the most recent was a few days ago and promised me a $30 credit on my next bill and no contract extension. I asked on their website via "Live Chat" if they had any information on it, since I was prescient enough to know the website was not a place to try to upgrade if I had anything out of the ordinary to do (this I learned from a previous experience with Verizon Wireless that I can't even go into right now. I don't have the energy or strength in my fingers for a story that long). No, he said, I would need to call customer service. He gave me the number.

Poor Tamra, who was unlucky enough to answer my call, walked me through the ways that my bill would change, and really ridiculous charges, etc. It was a much longer experience than it should have been, largely because my bill next month would be more expensive than my bill this month (if I hadn't gone over by about 400 minutes...) AND more expensive than the new plan, even. Poor Tamra. THAT was difficult to explain. Then I asked about the $30 credit.

"I don't have record that we mailed you a letter." Funny, since it had my phone number, name, and address on it. "Well, we outsource some of our marketing so it could be that they sent it. Was there another number on the letter?" Well, maybe, but it's at home now and I'm at work. "Well, you can call us back. We're open until 11 tonight." I don't want to upgrade without the $30 credit, Tamra, and I sure don't want to use my apparently precious minutes to call and be led through another conversational rope course about it. On a Friday night. "Well, I'm sorry-it's not that I don't believe you got the letter. You probably did. But there's no way I can give you a credit on your bill. It won't be approved."

You know what? Thanks for the vote of confidence, Tamra, but don't bother upgrading my plan. I'll just get a couple of tin cans and a rope.

today is going swimmingly!

This morning when I was on my way out the door (15 minutes late, as usual), I saw the package that had arrived yesterday that I assumed was for my upstairs neighbor, as I do not have packages delivered to my apartment (too much temptation for the crackheads, you see) and they apparently order online at least 4 days a week, since there always seems to be a package waiting for them on my porch (I know, very disheartening).

But the package had my name on it!

"What the heck could this be?" I wondered, since I never get packages delivered to my apartment.

I didn't recognize the sender, but thankfully the post office had already sliced through the top of it, perhaps to make sure it didn't have a bomb in it (thank you so much for your concern about my safety!), so I could see that it contained three thin letter-size paperback books.

"Hmm..." I wondered. I opened the package on the porch (like I said, I *never* get packages at home!) and...

My dissertation had arrived in printed form! Hooray! I wish I could paste a .gif of fireworks without looking like a douchebag, because that's what it felt like.

I've been on cloud 9 all day. Of course, I only read the epilogue and acknowledgements, and I've already found a typo, but who cares!? The cover says, "Graduation Date: 2009" which is last year! Not next week, not three years from now, but a previous date!

So while I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up, at least I have proof that 1) I have a PhD bitches, 2) I'm a good writer, and 3) I can construct a logical and innovative theory and back it up with data using appropriate methods of study.

Sweet.

sink or swim.

Well, hello there.

It has been forever, I guess. At least a few months, that is. Since then I've been doing my improv, working at making my job work, trying to scrape by paycheck to paycheck, so pretty much the same stuff I was doing before.

That's pretty much why I haven't updated the blog--I'm not really sure what the point is. I wish I could say I've been writing, but I haven't. I wish I could say I've been trying to find a faculty job, but I haven't been. I think at this point I am working on sustaining unsustainability as long as possible.

I know I need to get up and grab a hold of life. You know, grab the bull by its horns, step up to the plate and swing, sink or swim. It's just, it's so much easier to sink.

I don't think I'm sabotaging myself, or that I'm afraid of failing, and I'm really liking being called "the Doctor." I feel like I earned it.

But it's like, working on my dissertation was like being on a treadmill that was constantly going, going, going, and I always thought I wasn't going to make it, or just overwhelmed by fatigue. Now, the treadmill is off, so I'm just standing there. In an empty gym, staring at the walls.

I think I just don't know how to go after what I want. Maybe I never have. Gosh, how depressing, right?

In good news, I had a nice party this weekend, making Valentine's Day cards. It was a craft/tea party, so I went to Ikea and bought a tea set and tray. I've been wanting one for quite some time. It was a real treat to be able to use it. I also bought myself three bunches of flowers and combined it into a super bouquet. That's really the way to do it.

But you know me, when I go, I go big.